Love me

One of my fav song..A touching song, if only i find someone like the grandpa..


I read a note my grandma wrote
Back in 1923
Grandpa kept it in his coat
And he showed it once to me
He said boy you might not understand
But a long long time ago
Grandma's daddy didn't like me none
But I loved your grandma so

We had this crazy plan to meet
And run away together
Get married in the first town we came to
And live forever
But nailed to the tree where we were
Supposed to meet instead
I found this letter and this is what it said

If you get there before I do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I don't know how long I'll be
But I'm not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
And between now and then
Till I see you again
I'll be loving you
Love me

I read those words just hours before
My grandma passed away
In the doorway of the church
When me and grandpa stopped to pray
I know I'd never seen him cry
All my 15 years
But as he said these words to her
His eyes filled up with tears

If you get there before I do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I don't know how long I'll be
But I'm not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
And between now and then
Till I see you again
I'll be loving you
Love me

Between now and then till I see you again
I'll be loving you
Love me

What's next

I did a layout title "The one" here's a teaser. Photo taken with a hp so not well taken, let me retake it with my camera again.. Hmmm this is in response to ah jun's challenge for me. I think it looks abit empty let me try to add some more embellishment. put more of my fav floewrs, butterlies maybe hahaha.. lets see......

Nelson's farewell album

Get each of my collegue to do a page and I consolidate it and added a few more pages.. here it is.. eh and guess what I actualy forgoten to take a pic of the page that I did for him :( oh mine... so blur..

Really like the cross and the bible quote that I stamped. Just got this stamp from US hehehehe..

Click on the below....

Sad

The day finally came, Nelson is finaly going to the US.I feel sad that he is leaving.. he is such a good team lead, mentor, advisor. Even though I do not report to him directly, but he has been really a good mentor to me.

Life will be tough for me without him around.. I wonder how to do the forecast piece, I am not even at his level...

eyes popping out

I am still in the office alone... so sad. Eyes about to pop out. So pain, after staring at the spreadsheet for so long, trying to figure out the variance.

What to do, serve me right for trying to geh qiang, got proper audit route, full set dont do , choose this path. I always take the weird path. In fact lately one interviewer asked me if I am a smart person. How to answer this question, anyway he replied said that since I am with Nanyang Girls'I must be smart . HAHA :) He ask why did I go poly. yup, I am proud to say I am a NYGH girl and well I did qualified to go NTU, I didn't take up the offer.. hahah

Well guess God wants me to be tougher. I think lately I starting to turn more and more stone, so tired and a few time I wanan cry but tears don't flow no matter how upset I am. oops this is a bad sign.. I think maybe I will tear when I see those sad movies, sad novels. hmmm hopefully I still can tear else sounds like I am a cruel person ahah..

On a separate note, I am sick of this blog layout, you think I should change it. YA i am always trying to change, but guess I better settle down, else i will end up like what I did the last time round. Got fed up one fine day, delete everything away and start a new blog again... oops................

Radom thoughts

face a little challenge while serving on Sunday, well hope that doesn't happen again... hmmm dealing with people is never easy. Dear Abba father, don't do this to me again, eh I know you want to show me something but I am not ready yet, or at least pls send some angel to me. :)

Oh yes while serving, this lady is so sweet, can see she appreciate me serving her the holy communion, Thanks sister, you make my day.

Now come to think about it, something else happen. I won't share here, just too personal, those close to me will know. I wonder what is god telling me, or showing me. This time round, at least the heart is more at peace, at rest. Some day I will know what is god's will for me. I am sure HE will show me

Oh I just realise my family is coming back,I had rememeber the wrong date.. eh... blur me agian. hehe

come to think of it , I am going to miss the peace, quietness. sob sob. Nevermind I am reaching 35, so I can get my own housing liao. Brother Xiao Heng say I very permisstic. Eh maybe yes. But again this is call prepration . I did tell God I dont want to be alone but if so happens, well just got to accept the fact.

We shall see.. u will hear from my updateas again.

Finally the farewell album for my teamlead is ready.. I will post up the photos soon

Quickly did a layout too, in response to Ah jun's challenge for me.My the other half criteria.. I will post up here soon. ...

Its a beautiful day :)

A lovely day. I wake up feeling happy. Didnt slept for long as usual, wake up feeling hot and thirsty again. I think I should stand by a bottle of water in future.

Cyn, KP,KL, Beanard plus me go to the south ridge walk. A pity Simm Yinn couldn't make it :(


Start from Harbourfront to Mount Fabour, Henderson Waves, Picnic Hill, Alexandara Arch, Hort Park, Canopy walk end at Bukit Chengdu (think the spelling is wrong) museum .

I am so glad the weather is so good , else at the kind of time we start 9.15am, we would have become roasted Pigs or Monkeys?

KP now has been teased as the monkey :p, cos we say this guy practicing some martial arts at the Picnic Hill with another guy(the shifu most likely). The movments look like lao gao (monkey) . KP mimic the movements hahaha and we all have good luff, As usual KL is in his humourous ways, bernard with his straigth foward humour, cyn with her usual bubberlines.. (is there such a word btw ) Ok you guys will get what I mean.

Am so glad that I am out with u guys, I didnt realy say it out but I really appreciate you guys. Its always fun to be with you guys especially all the guys are so much younger than me. Spreading your joy to me makes me happy...


Simm Yin join us later in the afternoon, just to meet us.. lovely gal. And I realise she is 12 years younger than me when she ask how we celberate our 21 bday. Oh mine she is so young..................................

Hey for the rest of my friends, sorry to make you guys worry about me a few days ago. straighten my thoughts. God is good..

我知道我变漂亮了

我知道我变漂亮了 - 《一切完美》主题曲
詞/曲：石欣卉
製作：陳達偉

过去的批评嘲讽 Let it go Let it go
过去的轻蔑冷落 Let it go Let it go
有些人口不饶人 却忘了瞧瞧自己
又有什么资格

时刻都善良待人 Let’s move on Let’s move on
时刻都做好本分 Let’s move on Let’s move on
有些人心思浅薄 绝不是宽容
自暴自弃的理由

也许 确实也受过言语打击
也许 从来也没什么好际遇
但千万别将勇气深锁在阴影里
我们又不会妨碍这世界继续美丽

我知道我变漂亮了
我知道我被注意了
曾难过 失落
微笑一下就过
外在的美貌容易戳破
内在的美好细水长流

我知道我变漂亮了
我知道我也豁达了
不自卑 不埋怨
就算还差一点点
用内涵弥补一切缺陷
内在的美 迷住每个人的眼

Feeeeling down

Dont know why just woke up feeling terrible..

Again slept at 12 plus, woke up at about 1 or was it 2 am.. feeling warm and thirsty, turn on the fan, but simply too tired to go find water..

slept, woke up at 5 plus or so.. gosh why did i keep on waking up... this is not rest man... force to sleep , alarm clock rang at 6.30, my body just refuse to wake up.. Was thinking to work from home in morning then go to work in office since raining..

nah the next moment i woke up at close to 8am..oops rush rush out by 8.20 miss the lrt, miss the mrt train.. arrg..reach office at close to 9.30am.. opps.. so late..

seealot of work, changes piling.. arrrggggggg.......

really feel terrible to the verge of tearing. Suddenly feeling my gastric at work again, tell myself be still be cool... Just feel pressurize. Feel alot of emotions bottom up... nah.. how i can I can be like some of my friends to just freely say out what they feel, what they want.

I admit I got alot of reservations on this............... coward of me I know.. I can be confident at work but never in relationships with people. Oh God, I know you will answer my prayers, but when will that be ?

Sing with the Angels.....

I have been listing to Hillsong "Hope" lately. Kind of just needed this to keep me going . Still is my favourite. Now realise Angels is nice too...

I was thinking last night, I am not afraid of being dead, cos being with lord and singing with the angels is a wonderful thing. But lord pls dont make me die as a 独居老人腐尸发臭, u know all those headlines u see in newspaper of rotting bodies of old folks found and dying alone in their homes. Eh let me at least even if alone die happily in peace. Not in suffering pain.

I know I sound negative but guess being alone at home I tend to think alot of rubbish and crap. Well I am still of human fresh

Now enjoy...

This week..

Have not being updating this blog cos i am simply busy. Ok allright excuse, there is time for everything, its a matter of priority. I been busy with work cos took over the forecast portion from my team lead. Nope not a promotion for me just more work, wanted to learn something else, challenge myself before I rot and bored myself suppporting the day to day transacions of G China.

I been losing touch with what I used to do, hopefully the forecast role will bring me back to where I was previously.

Have been sleeping on average 4-5 hours per day.. Thank God for the strength given to me, Thank Jesus too.


My sisters and parents are away on tour so left me all alone in the house. I don't really miss them yet. Opps I know I mean but I kind of enjoy the peace and silence, the room all to myself. Imagine I can just play the workship songs on my laptop blasting it. I can't do that when they are around.. :p

Plus no nagging from my mother. She been nagging me everyday to quickly go find someone. I know she meant well, she don't want to be sure I don't end up lonely by myself. But well I guess I either met the wrong guy or meet the right guy but just ........ well it take 2 hands to claps. To meet someone who can really be ur life mate, life soul partner just isn't that easy. Men are hard to understand, sometimes they are just either block heads, idiots(pardon my language), or well simply pretending. God knows what's on their minds..

Ok back to my week's adventure.
Started with Monday. Thank God for the food that Karen gave me. Her nuo mi fan is really yummy. Was working really really hard concentrating with eyes glued on my laptop when suddenly. Lights off.. oops.. and then back again. My heart went *POP*. Did I hear something, ok I think thats just my wild imagination. Notice the fan is still swinging. Ok probaly just the power supply glitch/dip. Why did it happen at 12 midnight plus and when I am all alone.

Saw Karen on line and tell her, and she laugh at me. I went to find a torch and standby at the table. Just in case if really power supply issues, I won't be in darkness. Play workship songs to calm myself abit. hahah almost wanted to have the lights on in the bedroom but nah I couldnt sleep with lights on.. so well pray in tongues and ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Tuesday,
oh mine.. work till past 11 went home. reach home , bathed and start to work agian till 1 pm. Running Nose.... wake up at 2 am with realy bad running Nose, dragged myself up reluctantly. Went all over the place to look for tissue, arrrg can't find any so toilet rolls. I was really cold and wrapped myself in my blanket, my nose feels so terrible, whole body infact.

Wednesay,
wake up feeling much better. oh mine how did i ever wake up at 6 plus and reach office by8am. Have the fearful forecast call, making some boos boos. my team lead caution me again.. i know i just wasnt concentrating and make that boo boo :(

Reach home early, do my laundry.. hoho saw xiao heng online and tell him I don;t want to be like one of my ex bosses. single, alone, workaholic, fierce.. I guess if one has no partner, u can't blame her for being workaholic, having high expectations. Nah i dont want to be like this and always remind myself.

hmm i think i should start to be icy, cold fierce so people wont come and eat me. Always kena bullied. When would these people start to see my loving kindness in me..

Thursday
Oh Becky is here for training, catch up with her buy her the nice fishballs from the handsome hawker. Wanted to bring her to have the mango juice, but well its drizzling and kind of far so went amoy instead.

Have dinner with Janet and Becky at night. hmm fun dinner with interesting stories about chinese language. Now Becky shared with us touching stories of the Sichua earthquake.. hmm I will share with all of u on another item.

Raining again................arrrrg couldnt get a cab for Becky so well Janet took her to take the mrt since she taking.. I took the bus walk back in drizling rain.

oh this rain is making me really moody i think.. cough cough.. oops i think i gotten the cough bug and old time enemy Gastric is back I think....

I been thinking alot especially now I am alone. hmmm I think one day I will probably gone mad with all this thoughts of mine. Maybe I will end up finding myself talking to the wall one day... God help me....

Kilkenny is not that bitter afterall

I am into my Friday blues again. Don't know why bu tlately I been having the "you are big fat ugly old hag" feeling.

No dates tonight though well my gf did ask me out to join them to support one of their friend who is in the clark quay bazzar, I just don't feel like going.

Went for my massage which I book like a mth ago and cleanly forgotten abt it. Went Daiso to get my contains to put my craft barang barang after this. Still can't find the 12X12 container size for my papers.. hmmm..

Went home feeling lonely and sad. Look around the house and spotted Kilkeny i can't remmeber if I am the one who bought it, well I decide to drink it.. hmm it doesn't taste that bad afterall. Always think its bitter but it isn't bitter tonight, think my life is more bitter maybe. I am being left on the shelf spinning cobsweb again...